High Priorities

Nearly all of my sentimental tattoos have come from months of back-and -forths between my only trusted tattoo artist and I. There’s one that marks getting through one of the hardest periods of my life, another that reminds me of my favorite poem, and a portrait of my dog Baxter. Then, there’s my Bojack Horseman tattoo, fittingly the result of an all-day drinking spree on New Year’s Eve.

A few years ago, my then core group of friends and I went out for a holiday brunch that quickly devolved into bar hopping and bad decisions. Among those poor life choices was opting to all get spur-of-the-moment New Year’s tattoos. I didn’t want to be too impulsive with something that would be on my body forever, but I didn’t want to be left out either, so I figured I’d get a watered down version of a tattoo I’d wanted for years. I went first to ensure I didn’t back out. Lucky for me, everyone else did, making me the lone friend with a commemorative NYE 2023 tattoo.

I don’t hate it, but had I taken the time I wanted to with planning it, it would have more details that made it unique to me. Now, it’s not only a snapshot of a moment in the show that lifts me up when I’m feeling down.

It’s also a reminder of why I like to keep my drinking to a minimum. My drunken self rarely operates in the best interest of my sober self.

Alcohol, in moderation, makes me far more outgoing - I’d never belt out Tenacious D’s “The Final Showdown” with a stranger at karaoke sober - but it often resurfaces bummers I’ve repressed or ramps up my anxiety. My stoner side, on the other hand, always has my back. We both love a good snack, laughing at the mundane, and keeping the vibes chill. A few hits from my dab rig (right now I’m loving the Puffco Peak) and the rapid fire of ADHD thoughts slow down enough to let me get to work. But I’d still succumb to being couch locked every time I toke up without taking sober time to organize my obligations by state of mind.

It all starts with my to-do list. Every task in my todo app of choice, Things, gets relevant contextual tags like “home,” “email,” or “dogs,” depending on what I need or where I need to be to complete a task. Stoner-friendly todo’s get a “high” tag. I don’t limit those things to my more mellow moments, but it’s nice to see everything I can reasonably do when I’m there. I’d never do work-related tasks after a smoke session, so I make sure to only look at stoner-friendly acts like prepping a salsa, doing the dishes, washing my couch, or writing something outside of work like a creative story.

The real key, though, is capturing the ideas I have when I’m high and forgetful. I’ve used Drafts as the first destination for every idea I have for over ten years. Once it’s recorded there—my iPhone’s Action Button is set to make new notes immediately—I can add tags and send the text to the appropriate app. For the non-project related thoughts I have after taking a few puffs—funny jokes or cheeky observations—I tag those as “high notes,” an idea I stole from this profile of Rick Steves. Those notes go into Day One, where I can dig through them later to find any interesting kernels worth expanding upon. This has led to things like turning a silly, meaningless movie title into a full-fledged script. It  may never see the light of day, but I’ve enjoyed writing it.

I’ve done a lot of writing for that project after a puff or two; I’ve found I’m a lot funnier, even if those jokes often require sober refinement. But under the influence, I’m susceptible to distractions like my phone’s pings, or just one more round of Marvel Snap. I can’t fight that aspect of my ADHD without brute force, so I’ve set up a Focus Mode on all my Apple devices specifically for when I’m high. Because I devised this while stoned, it’s simply titled “High.” In it, I block out all notifications aside from messages, and I don’t have any apps on my Home Screen.

Instead, the home screen for that mode has four widgets. The top one shows all the YouTube videos I’ve saved for later and tagged “high” in the app Play and a list of movies and shows I want to watch. The middle widget shows all the tasks I’ve tagged “high,” while the bottom ones let me see what music is playing and send notes directly to “high notes.” By keeping all of these front and center on my phone’s main screen, I’ve ensured I never lack for something to do, even when I’m couch locked.

I still have nights where a smoke session leads to little more than catching up on my show of the moment and picking up a good meal; you can pry those nights from my warm, tingly hands. Still, I like to make the most of my time. When I’m up in the clouds and inspiration strikes, all I have to do is hop into my high Focus Mode and get to work— Sober Jordan’s always grateful.

Plug-ins

I reviewed the Light Phone III. It’s my favorite new phone, and it’s one of the few things that’s gotten me to cut down on my screen time in any meaningful way. Also, a gentle reminder to stop reading books on your phone. I just got this arm from Twelve South that turns my iPad into a second monitor; it rules. I’ve been replacing my morning Instagram check-ins with reading some poetry using the Poesie app for curated selections of good poems. Speaking of morning routines, I recently started using the app Bend to do stretches every morning when I wake up. I also subscribed to Derrick Gee’s Patreon as an alternative to algorithmic music recommendations. He’s already shown me five new artists I can’t stop listening to. If you’re familiar with Brian Eno’s Oblique Strategies, you may like this app that lets you rotate through different quotes from his (now very expensive) stack of creatively inspiring words right on your home screen. Pocket is shutting down; bummer! But I highly recommend Readwise Reader as an alternative. It has built-in support for newsletters and RSS feeds, plus excellent text-to-speech and an impressive system for storing your highlights.