Call me, maybe

System Update, Part One

May 05, 2020

Hello! I’ve been thinking a lot about how this newsletter can best help people in this weird, uncertain time. Medea and I thought that, with so many of us having to spend our days at home right now, this might be a good time to do some digital spring cleaning. Over the course of the next few issues, I’ll be addressing different topics, like notifications and photo management, that can all be tidied up to make our lives a little less dreary right now. If you have anything related to digital organization that you struggle with, let us know by responding to this email, and we’ll see if we can help.

I’ll see you in a couple days for our next interview issue!

We’ve all sat across from a date, eagerly searching for any sign of their approval, only to watch them pull out their phone, have some sort of ambiguous reaction, then give a quick apology and return to the conversation. Outside the general anxiety of wondering whether it was a joke at your expense, a note to a friend that you’re actually alright, or just another email from their boss asking if they can come in early tomorrow, it’s never really a big deal. Sure, you’ll never know if it was about you, but it’s really not that serious, and you’ve probably done it to someone else, too.

That it can be tossed aside, though, is a pretty good indicator that we’ve become pretty forgiving about our need to always be checking our phones. That’s not inherently bad, but it’s not great when that constant checking is tied to some sort of work anxiety, which was my ongoing struggle in the pre-corona times.

I’ve mostly treated notifications as a direct line between me and the outside world, ready to be tugged at a moment’s notice, so I can always get the info I need. In theory, this would make life a lot easier by just presenting things as they’re needed. In the past, this has led to things like my lock screen getting flooded with emails from brands, barrages of @here Slack pings that never needed to be, and in earlier days, thirsty Facebook notifications about the first time that guy from that party I begrudgingly added posted in a while.

My old solution to combating endless notifications and a sea of red bubbles was to only turn on notifications for things that I absolutely needed to see and could act on—things like todo list tasks, calendar reminders, text messages, anything that might suffer if I didn’t see it in time. Back when I could be out and about, and everything was a distraction, this made sense, since I didn’t want to be beholden to my phone’s commands while I was spending some time with friends.

Now that I’m spending most of my days indoors, and I don’t get to see my friends, my priorities have changed. Organizing and retagging all of my bookmarks feels less important than saying hi to a friend I haven’t seen since 2018, and I’d rather know that my roommate’s safely back at home than see another reminder that I haven’t checked in to DuoLingo in three days. In isolation, staying in touch has become more important than staying on top of things.

To that end, I’ve started moving my notifications more towards things that can get me in touch with friends and family, or at least give me quick reassurance that they’re still safe. Where before I limited Instagram DMs to a simple red bubble, they now get a place on my lock screen and sound alerts too, since that’s one of the main ways I’ve been talking to people I haven’t been able to see since leaving for quarantine. I’ve also come to enjoy Snapchat’s nudges telling me who’s been posting on their story lately, just as a way to see that they’re okay, even if I don’t tap through the whole thing.

This whole pandemic has caused me to ease up on my stance that you should probably turn off most of your notifications, because they’ve become one of my best and most direct lines to the outside world. I didn’t need to have YouTube in my face telling me to check out Polygon’s latest Unraveled video because I was sure I’d be on Twitter to see when it posted. Now, I’m trying to spend as little time outside of work on Twitter as possible, so I’m missing a lot of stuff I used to like watching and reading. Getting those notifications used to be a distraction from the work I struggle with focusing on, but now they’re one of the only ways I can be sure to see the things I want to see, especially the ones that distract me from everything else going on. Even if I don’t end up watching every new movie on MUBI, or reading every hot take on a mundane, non-corona-related topic, it’s nice to consistently see that things are being made that exist outside the general dread a lot of us are feeling right now.

I’m not saying all your notifications should be about likes and DMs, but it can be really helpful in this time of isolation to give yourself more concrete reminders that your friends are around and easy to reach. Still, notifications have a lot of usefulness outside of that, so it’s good to keep things like to-do list reminders, calendar events, habit or medicine reminders, or journaling prompts at the forefront to stay on top of the things that matter.

This might all seem frivolous, and in a time where many of us were too preoccupied to see how unfairly reliant on work our lives have become, it totally would have been. But most of us have probably had to revisit our relationships with our jobs, in one way or another, because of the current crisis. Using that time to also revisit how we’ve configured our phones to conform to our work lives can help us rearrange things to foster something better. For you, that may not mean pings every time your friend hops on Houseparty or a new podcast hits your feed, but if you’ve mostly treated your phone as a tool for getting things done, it’s worth trying to sprinkle in a few things that don’t do much more than keep you in touch with the world outside your walls. We could all use the connection right now.

📚 Good Reads:

This boredom could be your chance for ‘the Great Reset’ (GQ): This is another, more thorough, explanation of why now is a great time for reassessing our relationships with our devices. I’ve been spending the last week combing through my apps, repurposing different tools, trying to make my iPad and iPhone better suited to the things that I want to do, not just what I have to do. However you want to frame your Great Reset, for those of us who find ourselves with a little extra free time, now’s a great moment to give it a shot.

In a pandemic, is ‘wellness’ just being well-off? (The Cut): Another thing to reassess right now, in addition to how we use our devices to take care of ourselves, is how much our situations allow us the space to even reflect on those things in the first place. As we find better ways to use our time on our gadgets, it’s worth setting aside some time to also figure out how to help those less fortunate, even if it’s just by logging on and doing some virtual volunteering for a couple hours every week.

How to be a better ally to women on Zoom (Mashable): If you’re still adjusting to remote life, it’s worth brushing up on how to make sure you’re not always speaking over women on every conference call. Choppy internet isn’t an excuse for not letting someone get a word in.

Is this the future of the fashion show? (The New York Times): Every industry, in some way or another, is having to adapt to what’s going on right now. While this fashion experiment may not be the final solution, it’s going to be interesting to see what sort of creative things people try as we start adjusting to this new, weird normal.

Why you’re so irritated by everything (Forge): Anxiety is a weird, funny, gross, no good thing. It’s affecting all of us right now, and while there isn’t a way to just toss this all over the side of the boat, it’s comforting to know that you’re not an asshole for being on edge right now. Just, don’t be an asshole to others because of it. 

🌐 Just Browsing:

💕 And now, here’s something we hope you’ll really like:

Minutiae: We’re all feeling a more than a little distant from each each other right now. This app sends you a notification, once per day, and gives you five seconds to snap a shot of whatever you’re experiencing at the moment, for 1,440 days. Then, you’ll get another notification with a picture from someone else around the world. It’s a nice reminder to stop, take a look around, and appreciate whatever it is you’re doing, and get a peek at what someone else is up to. When things feel repetitive and mundane, this is a nice way to give your surroundings a fresh perspective.

As always, if you have any questions, feedback, or just want to say hello, feel free to drop me a line on Twitter.

My thanks to Medea Giordano for editing this issue.