Better left unread

I’m currently in the middle of my longest “emotional timeout” to date.  Prompted by an emotionally taxing event, I’ve largely withdrawn from my social life and stopped replying to everyone in favor of tear-inducing binge watches and heartfelt journal entries. Usually it takes a few weeks for me to recover and reemerge. But this time, some of my friends haven't heard from me since last spring.

I know many of them will understand — I’ve been helping take care of my mom while she goes through cancer treatment for over a year — but I still feel guilty I can’t muster a quick "Hey! Still alive, hope you're well!" Even when I have been able to chat, I’ve spent the last year keenly aware of how often people cushion their words around me, afraid to rock the already shaky boat of someone whose parent is dying. I don't have the words to exist in that space, so I opted for silence.

I should've trusted my friends more. A few weeks ago, a friend took a moment to remind me that she's there if I want to talk about my family situation. She’s been through something similar, but we hadn't ever talked about it. We've spent most of our friendship time rambling about dating drama, plotting our departures from a town neither of us likes, and singing our hearts out at karaoke. And yet, though we’ve only known each other for a year and a half, she could tell I needed the escape. 

With her reminder that I can talk about the elephant in the room, things are finally starting to feel okay. I’m starting to catch up on my messages. We’re going out and doing things, while still holding space for the weight of everything I’m going through. Reconnecting has stopped feeling as daunting.

But I can’t just apologize and move on; I need to ensure I don’t fall back into the same sort of extended timeout next time things get tough. In avoiding the grief that comes with a cancer diagnosis, I turned to doomscrolling in my free time to numb it all. I missed exciting events, fun nights out with friends, and time with family simply because funny videos were the only things that could take the edge off. Entertaining as they are, TikToks of creators making monstrous sausages can't help me work through my grief or catch up on my DMs. So, I deleted TikTok off my phone and put Readwise Reader, a feature-packed read-it-later app, on my dock.

Any time I come across something I want to read but don’t quite have the time for — web articles, interesting PDFs, newsletters — I save it to Reader. Like any good read-it-later app, Reader can save any interesting online article for later reference, but it also supports newsletters, PDFs, and e-books.

The key to the app, though, is its integration with Readwise’s flagship highlighting service, which stores and syncs quotes from your e-books and web articles. Whenever I find an interesting quote, particularly compelling piece of writing, or information I'd like to research later, I can highlight it and it'll go straight to my notetaking app. From there I can use it to build off a creative project I'm working on, connect it to research I'm doing for a topic I'm interested in, or add it to my ongoing wisdom document a la Merlin Mann's Wisdom Project.

Handy as that is, Reader has done more for me than just giving me a single place for all things text and a way to store the best clippings for long-term reference. It's also helped bring back my creative spark. By emphasizing the power of highlights, I'm taking more time to think about why a quote speaks to me. Is the sentence so catchy I run straight to my keyboard and try to write something half as good? Does it push against my preconceived notions on a matter that I need to unpack more? Or does it simply offer some wisdom and perspective that I can use to reframe how I see the world?

In any case, I'm no longer highlighting things and letting them be. Every highlight helps me build towards a new insight or piece of creative work and gives me something to focus on rather than stew in anticipatory grief. I'm still giving myself space to feel those feelings, but since I've been saving so many noteworthy quotes from books like The Dead Moms Club and Grief is for People, I'm better equipped to handle those emotions without another timeout. And I’m trying to be a little more reachable these days.

Plugins

🗒️ Speaking of taking notes, I've been going analog and carrying a Traveler's Notebook with me everywhere I go. This little thing rules — I'm officially a stationery nerd. 📖 I'm still a devout Boox Palma user, but after about 50 TikToks about the tiny Xteink X4, I picked one up for myself. It’s small enough to fit in my wallet, lasts forever, and doesn’t cost nearly as much as the Palma. I just wish it had a front light.. 🤖 Pantheon is finally available in the US via Netflix. It's a truly moving show about AI, consciousness, and what it means to be human. 📰 Friend of the newsletter and fellow Wired gear desk alum Pia Ceres launched a newsletter of her own! If you like Rebooting, you'll love Semi Offline. 🚲 Speaking of friends, you should also subscribe to Rebooting editor Daniel Varghese’s newsletter, Leg Day, about all things city cycling. 📷 In another effort to stay off my phone, I went to my local Scheel's (did you know stores can have ferris wheels inside?) and bought a Camp Snap camera. I'm taking more pictures than ever, and it's nice being forced to move on after hitting the shutter button rather than obsess over the quality of the shot. ✍️ Have you considered a personal writing retreat? 📚 Try treating reading like working out. 🌡️ What happens when you stop checking the weather?

My thanks to Daniel Varghese for editing this issue.